Unknown Hurt
by basketballbabe50
Summary: Tony's hiding something from Gibbs, which is never a good idea.
1. Chapter 1: Hidden

_A/N: Sorry if anything is incorrect in this story. I am most certainly not an expert. Thanks, all._

 **Chapter One: Hidden**

"I think, if we're honest, we all know she's a killer. Maybe she didn't kill her husband, but I looked in her eyes. You know what they said?"

"What, Tony?"

"Well, I'll tell ya, probie. They said, _I'm a killer_."

"Are you still talking about that stupid bet you made?" Kate asked.

Both men looked up. "It's not stupid, Kate! It's, in fact, a very serious bet."

"You bet twenty dollars, Tony," Kate remembered.

"Yes, and that would be twenty dollars lost, wouldn't it?"

"What was the bet anyway?" Kate wondered.

McGee answered, "I told Tony that Private Benjamin Oliver's best friend killed him because he was having an affair with his wife and he wanted to get Private Oliver out of the way so he could marry her."

"And I told young probie here that that was why Private Oliver's wife would kill him, because she wanted to marry his best friend," Tony told them all matter-of-factly.

Kate furrowed her eyebrows as she said, "Tony, you always think it was the wife."

"And, statistically speaking, Tony, about 45% of murders are done by a friend. Only about 9% are done by a spouse," McGee answered.

Tony rolled his eyes. After McGee shot him annoyed look, he said, "Sorry, probie. Why don't you tell me again and I'll pretend to care."

"Think whatever you want, Tony, but statistics don't lie," McGee said.

"Yeah, whatever. What are we even still doing here, anyway? It's, like, three in the morning," Tony noticed.

"Yeah, but Gibbs did say to sit here until he got back," Kate told them through a yawn.

Tony groaned, "Ugh! I just wanna go home and go to bed."

"That's great, DiNozzo. Why don't you go home, get some sleep. The rest of us will find Private Oliver's killer while you get your beauty sleep."

Tony closed his eyes in Gibbs' presence. "Sorry, boss. Did not know you were behind me."

"Yeah, figured. All of you, go home and pack," Gibbs announced. As Tony's mouth began to open, Gibbs told him, "Before you ask, DiNozzo, we're going to Chesapeake. Private had some business down there and got into a nasty fight with a group of men, according to his wife."

"Chesapeake? That's on the other side of the state," Tony mentioned.

"Well, DiNozzo, if there's a problem, you can stay behind," Gibbs offered.

"No, no, I'm good," Tony told him.

"Alright then. Go, now. All of you. Car's leaving at 0700." They all scurried out of their desks and grabbed their stuff. They nearly ran to the elevator at their boss' order.

"Alright, so it's three-ish now. It'll take 'bout half an hour to get home. Ten to pack. Five to shower. And so I can sleep at...four fifteen?" Tony added in his head, after they got in the elevator.

"Three forty five," McGee corrected. "You added an hour for your drive home instead of half an hour."

"Oh. Thanks, probie," Tony smiled slightly as McGee nodded.

Three forty five. Oh, that was a little sad. One, because he apparently couldn't add in his head anymore. And, two, because he'd only be able to get three hours and fifteen minutes of sleep at the most. Sad, alright. And Tony loved sleep. _Well, that's life, I suppose_ , Tony thought as he remembered life really didn't care about each individual's sleep. Aw well. What're you gonna do? So, Tony drove home, packed, showered, and went to bed at three forty five. But, for some reason, he didn't sleep a wink.


	2. Chapter 2: Trip

**Chapter Two: Trip**

Tony awoke after sleeping, maybe, half an hour in total. And he was to say the least exhausted. He glanced at his clock. 0600. Tony sighed, getting out of his bed. He put on a long sleeved button down shirt and a pair of jeans, despite it being the middle of summer. He headed straight for the bathroom to try and make himself look somewhat presentable. As he looked at himself in the bathroom mirror, he noticed that he did not look good. Still kind of disoriented from the little sleep he got, he looked dead tired. "Good lord," he breathed.

After some time, he walked out, looking not in the least bit tired. He even looked well rested. Hey, this wasn't his first rodeo. Something suddenly struck him in his tired state. He began searching his apartment for something or someone. After thoroughly checking over his place, he realized what he was looking for was not in his apartment anymore. Sighing with relief, he figured he better run. Gibbs was not one to wait. He made sure to lock his door on the way out.

* * *

As Tony walked out of the elevator to his desk, Gibbs said, "Elevator, DiNozzo. You're late."

"Right. That's my bad, boss. But, you know, it's only 0705. Some people wouldn't even call that late. I mean, that's only five minutes. That's not even fashionably late. That's just-"

"DiNozzo," Gibbs said simply.

Tony quickly said, "Shutting up now, boss."

Finally, Tony noticed McGee and Kate as they all got in the elevator. They both looked exhausted. Well, that was to be expected. They walked out of the elevator and got into the car. Gibbs driving and Kate in the passenger's seat. Tony sat in the back next to McGee without saying a word. It did not go unnoticed.

"Wow, Tony," Kate said.

"What?" Tony mumbled out, tiredly. Then, quickly, he cleared his throat, and asked, "What?"

"You didn't say anything about calling shotgun," Kate told him.

Tony shrugged. "Did you want me to? 'Cause I can. You just have to ask. You can ask me to do anything, Kate," Tony charmingly smiled, even though she couldn't see him.

"Why do I even talk to you, DiNozzo? You are a pig!" Kate told him.

Tony shrugged again, the smile unknowingly falling from his face as he began to stare out the window as they traveled across the state.

* * *

Tony jumped suddenly as there was a knock on the window that he was resting his forehead against. He realized the car was parked and no one else was in the car. They were all standing in front of his closed door. Gibbs had been the one to knock on the window. Tony shook his head, realizing he must have fallen asleep on the ride. The car was parked in front of an old restaurant. Suddenly, Tony felt very hungry. He unbuckled his seatbelt and opened his door, waiting for Gibbs to say something about him falling asleep. But he didn't. Instead, Gibbs just studied the young man before him, then shook his head slightly, and walked into the restaurant, motioning for the rest of them to follow.

As Tony stepped out of the car, he realized his hair was plastered to his forehead with sweat. Then, he realized that it was really hot.

"Tony!" Kate called out as she noticed Tony just standing there.

"Right! Coming!" he managed.

He walked in and sat down at the table by McGee. Kate was seated by Gibbs on the other side. "You look hot, Tony," Kate said, then realized what she said and inwardly cursed herself.

Tony didn't miss a beat as he smiled and said, "Thank you for noticing, Kate."

"That's not what I meant. I mean, it's, like, ninety degrees outside and you're wearing long sleeves," Kate said.

Tony shrugged once again, saying, "I'm fine."

Before anything else could be said, the waitress appeared and they ordered their food.

Not much was said the rest of their time at the restaurant. They finished their food, paid, and went back to the car to finish their trek to Chesapeake.

* * *

After another long ride, with nobody really saying anything, they arrived at their destination.

"Agent Gibbs?" They heard as they stepped out of the car and grabbed their bags. A man was walking towards them. "I have four rooms for you all in the back like you requested. I'll take you if you'll follow me?"

Gibbs nodded as all four followed the man. As they arrived at the back of the place, the man said, "Okay. We got two on the left here, one on the right, and one at the end. Each room has bathroom and shower, television, and bed." The man's phone rang on his hip. "Oh, I gotta take this. You guys okay here?"

They all nodded and he left. Gibbs and McGee chose rooms on the left, Kate chose the room on the right, and Tony had the room at the end of the hall. They walked in their rooms and set their bags down. Tony looked at the time. 1200. It was gonna be a long day.

They gathered in Gibbs room to get down to business.

* * *

Within the next seven hours, Tony and Gibbs had talked to two of the men Private Oliver got into a fight with and McGee and Kate had talked to the other three. However, the men didn't want to talk, so it took more time than needed. By the time they got back, it was 1930. And they had to compare the men's stories. As it turned out, all five men blamed the Private. They all said he got drunk and out of control. According to them, he picked the fight with them.

When they finished discussing and informing, it was late. Gibbs said, "Go get some sleep. All of you." For some reason, Tony felt the "all of you" was directed at him. Nevertheless, he nodded as he left with the others.

After Tony had showered and put on a t-shirt with pajama pants, he laid down in his bed at 0200. And he started to think, which was never good for him.


	3. Chapter 3: Thoughts

**Chapter Three: Thoughts**

Tony laid in bed, staring at the ceiling in the dark. Sadly, he couldn't sleep, due to the fact that he couldn't turn his head off. He was remembering. Remembering things from three days ago. Things that happened. Because it was imprinted in his mind. Three days ago, his father showed up. Yes. His father. After sixteen years. He reappeared. And not for the better.

He hadn't called or told Tony he was coming. No. He was just there. For a day, or two, Tony couldn't recall at the moment. In Tony's apartment when he got home. At first, Tony wondered how. Then, that didn't matter. His father was there. He wanted to know why.

 _ **3 days ago**_

 _Tony shut the door as he put down his bag. He walked over to put his gun away as he quietly said, "Dad."_

" _Junior. It's good to see you," the older man said._

 _Tony just said, "Why are you here?"_

" _Because. I need a favor," he told his son._

" _What?" Tony asked softly._

" _I got married."_

" _Again."_

" _Again."_

" _So? What do you want from me?" Tony asked._

" _I want you to meet her," he admitted._

" _No," Tony said simply._

" _Hear me out, Junior. She has a daughter, your step sister. I would like you to meet them," he requested._

" _No," Tony repeated._

" _Why are you being so thick headed? Just meet her."_

" _I don't want to. And you can't make me. You can leave through the door," Tony said, pointing at the door._

" _Alright, what's your problem?" he asked._

" _My problem? My problem is that you've dated and married over a hundred women probably since Mom died, and you want me to meet them. You want me to pretend like they are my mother, my family. You want to forget about her and you want to replace her. Well, I don't. I won't. And, well, I'm sure you think Mom would've hooked up with any man she saw if you had died in her place, so that's your explanation for whoring around isn't it? She wouldn't have. She loved you. Sad you can't say the same," Tony ranted. Too far._

 _His father grabbed Tony's right wrist with one hand and his right arm with the other, forcefully throwing him into the opposite wall. Tony absorbed the impact of the wall with his right shoulder. He was in trouble and he knew it. His father wasn't much to Tony, but he was bigger, stronger, scarier._

Tony remembered thinking, ' _I'm so screwed,'_ before drifting into a fitful night's sleep.

0430.

Tony awoke in a cold sweat.

0500.

Tony awoke due to his tossing and turning.

0520.

Tony awoke close to screaming.

0545.

Tony awoke suddenly before he could watch his own painful demise in his nightmare which haunted him.

0600.

"Get up! Get out here," Gibbs called as he opened the door, shutting it directly after.

Tony, not thinking, shot out of bed, grabbed his gun, and ran out to where Gibbs was seated at a kitchen table, gun at the ready.

McGee and Kate walked out of their own rooms and down the hallway, freezing in their tracks when they caught sight of Tony.

Gibbs slowly looked up at Tony, calmly saying, "You gonna shoot me, DiNozzo?"

Tony shook his head, trying to get rid of his drowsiness and exhaustion. "You said to get up and out here," Tony said, trying to understand.

"Yes, DiNozzo. I told you to get up. I told you to get out here. For breakfast. Not for an attack or an assault. For breakfast," Gibbs explained.

"Oh," Tony realized and quickly lowered his weapon.

Suddenly, Gibbs' amused face was replaced with one of confusion and concern. "Tony," Gibbs ventured, "what happened to your arm?"

' _Son...of...a...bitch,'_ Tony thought. He was wearing short sleeves.


	4. Chapter 4: Explain

**Chapter Four: Explain**

 _Previously:_

 _Suddenly, Gibbs' amused face was replaced with one of confusion and concern. "Tony," Gibbs ventured, "what happened to your arm?"_

'Son...of...a...bitch,' _Tony thought. He was wearing short sleeves._

 _Now:_

"What do you mean?" Tony recovered quickly.

Gibbs wasn't playing. "With me, DiNozzo," Gibbs said as he strode back to his room.

Tony felt his stomach drop as he walked down the hall to Gibbs' room.

' _Son of a-!'_ It was a rookie mistake and he knew it. He had been so careful to hide his arms. The rest of the bruises hadn't mattered. Except his arms. It was summer. Arms normally would show. It was hot. People wore short sleeves. Except Tony. Tony had been wearing long sleeves for the past two days to work. He knew he couldn't let anyone see his bruises! But, he'd been so sleep deprived, he hadn't thought! He thought there was trouble for some reason and just darted out on the alert, not worrying about his bruised arms. Now Gibbs knew. What he would do was another question.

Tony walked in and closed the door behind himself. Gibbs was seated on the bed, just sitting. Then, he looked up at Tony and said, "I thought it was odd, you wearing long sleeves in June, not complaining about the heat. Turns out, you were just lying to me."

"I wasn't lying to you, boss. Okay? I just wasn't telling you anything. It's different. I...didn't want anyone to see," Tony admitted.

Gibbs sighed. "So, now you're saying you do realize your arms are covered with bruises?"  
Tony looked at him. "Of course, how could I not? I just...you couldn't see. You, in particular. You, if you saw, you'd know. And, if you knew, you'd lose whatever faith you have in me, which may not be a lot, but it's all I got. And you would've thought I was incapable of doing anything. You would think I was an incompetent agent. You'd fire me and I wouldn't be able to find another job because I don't have a lot going for me. Then, I'd be evicted from my apartment because I wouldn't be able pay rent. And I'd have to live on the streets. And I don't wanna live on the streets!" he ranted, very close to panicking, if he was not already.

Gibbs put up a hand to halt his speech. "Whoa, whoa, whoa. Slow down. Okay? As for what I believe happened, I have no idea. Honestly. I can't think of anything for your arms...maybe more of you...to be bruised like that. And as for me firing you and your life going to hell, who do you think I am? I'm not gonna fire you because you're covered in bruises. I am just...surprised that you'd rather continue to work in long sleeves in the middle of summer, than just come to me and tell me what happened. What did happen?"

"It's not that I don't trust you, okay? It's that I can't. I can't tell you or anyone. It's...complicated," Tony tried to explain.

"DiNozzo. Were you threatened?" Gibbs asked.

Tony contemplated that for a few seconds before Gibbs said, "DiNozzo!"

To which, Tony nodded. He said, "I-um-he said that if I told anyone what he did, he'd know. And he'd come back. He might be bluffing. I've considered that. But, I really don't want him to come back."

Gibbs nodded. "Anthony, you can tell me. You know who he was, right?"

Tony nodded. "I-I dunno. He's scary. That sounded pathetic but, you know, it's true."

Gibbs smiled at Tony's embarrassment of letting his guard down. "Yeah, I believe that."

"How? You're not afraid of anything, boss," Tony said.

"DiNozzo, I'm not fearless. I get scared plenty. But, I've learned to mask that fear. Something you know something about, I'm guessing," Gibbs said.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, it was ninety degrees and your arms were completely covered! I mean, in the three years I've known you, I've rarely seen you show any emotion, except happy. I know you're not happy all the time because that's impossible, DiNozzo," Gibbs told him.

Tony smiled shyly at the fact that his boss knew him that well. "No. But, if you're happy, people don't ask questions."

Gibbs smiled dropped at that. "Tell me, Tony. Who did this?"

"I can't say," Tony replied.

"DiNozzo, I really don't feel like tearing the answer out of you. Just, trust me," Gibbs said.

Tony sighed, "I do trust you. I do. I just…"

Gibbs nodded. "Complicated."

Tony nodded.

"DiNozzo. Frankly, I don't give a damn how complicated it is," Gibbs said, trying a different tactic. "I want a name and I want it now."

It worked. After a moment, Tony said, "Okay. Alright. A name. It was Anthony DiNozzo...Sr."

"Your father?"


	5. Chapter 5: Conversation

**Chapter Five: Conversation**

 _Previously:_

" _DiNozzo. Frankly, I don't give a damn how complicated it is," Gibbs said, trying a different tactic. "I want a name and I want it now."_

 _It worked. After a moment, Tony said, "Okay. Alright. A name. It was Anthony DiNozzo...Sr."_

" _Your father?"_

 _Now:_

"My father," Tony assured him.

"Wait. I thought your father lived in New York?" Gibbs asked.

"He did, does. He came to surprise me with a visit a few days ago," Tony explained.

"A few days...Why didn't you tell me?" Gibbs wanted to know.

Tony looked up at the ceiling as he said, louder than he meant, "I didn't think you'd care!" As the room went completely silent, Tony looked at Gibbs and said, "I'm sorry. It's just, I'm your agent. You shouldn't have to worry about me or listen to my problems. You hire me to work, not to talk, right?"

"No," Gibbs said after a while.

"No?"

"No. I hired you to work, yes. But, that doesn't mean you can't come to me if you have a problem, and I'd say you have a very big problem."

"It's not...I can handle it. I have handled him for the past thirty three years. He's not...physical unless I do something. Every single time he's laid a hand on me, it was because I was over the line. I talk too much. I say things as I think of them. It's an impulse. Then, later, I regret them," Tony told him.

"DiNozzo. Are you saying you deserved to be beaten by your father?" Gibbs asked, seriously.

Tony looked unsure as he half shrugged.

Gibbs sighed as he heard the unbelievable truth that wasn't said. "You didn't. I don't care what you said, what you did. Because it doesn't matter. You...you never hurt your child. I don't care if he meant to or what was behind it. I don't care if he was pissed! You never raise a hand to your child. And it'll never be your fault. You should be able to feel safe in the presence of your father. You don't, though. You can't blame yourself for this. You're the victim, Tony. Stop trying to act like it was your fault!"

After a pause, Tony said, "I don't know how. You...you're the first person I've ever told and it's only because you ordered me to. I've always hidden my arms when my dad...got mad. Do I think it's my fault? Sometimes. Do I think it's right? No. And I know that because he didn't touch me at all until I was eight. After my mom died, he lost it. He was angry all the time and sad, I guess. He might blame me for her death or maybe I remind him of her. It hurts him. I get it. Except, I was the only one around to take it out on. So, I let him. I thought it would end at some point. After a few years, I knew it wouldn't. But, you know, even now, I still can never raise a hand back to him. I mean, I'm a federal agent. I could probably take him down if I wanted. But I don't. Ever. Because you know what I see whenever I look at him? I don't see my father, the one I once knew. I see a sad, angry, grieving old man. And, I know I'll never be what a son should be to him, and that's okay. It is what it is. Do I want a closer relationship? Of course. But, Gibbs, I'm never gonna get that, okay? That's why I never told you. It doesn't seem important to me because I know that no one can change what happens between us. Not CPS, not the NYPD, and not you. He's got friends in high places. There's nothing anyone can do, so I live with it."

"Did you just meet me?" Gibbs asked.

"What?" Tony wondered.

"'Cause I thought I'd known you for 'bout three and a half years now."

"So?"

"Well, you just said I couldn't do anything about it, like you just met me."

"Gibbs, look. He comes, does this, apologizes, then leaves. Ten years later, does the same thing. I...I think he feels bad after."

Gibbs shook his head. "Tony. Rule 42: _Don't ever accept an apology from someone that just sucker-punched you._ "

Tony smiled in indignation. "Oh, yeah?! Well, what about rule 14? I've already bent the line several times! If I'd said anything else, that'd be it! The line would be broken! He could've killed me," Tony smile dropped as his facade started to crumble completely. He shook his head slowly. "I know he wouldn't take it that far."

"Tony, I didn't tell you to break the line. I told you to come to me. I told you I'd take care of it. I told you, don't trust him when he says he's sorry. Here's another rule for you. Rule 36: _If it feels like you're being played, you probably are._ Tony, he's played you, several times. You need to trust me. When he says he's sorry, he's lying."


	6. Chapter 6: Gone

**Chapter Six: Gone**

The next day, they had arrested Private Oliver's killer (his brother due to envy. Fortunately no one had to lose any money) and were on the drive back. It was quiet. It was awkward. Tony had, not only, told Gibbs everything, and he wasn't sure of everything, but he was pretty sure McGee and Kate were somewhat suspicious. I mean, they'd obviously heard Gibbs ask him what was up with his arms. He'd no doubt they'd want answers, not now, but later. Preferably out of Gibbs' earshot.

But, the case was done. One less thing to worry about. One less thing to fret about. Not that he was fretting anything. He wasn't lying to Gibbs about his father only showing up every ten years. He'd shown, he'd done, he'd gone. And Tony knew he wouldn't be seeing him for a while. ' _That is really screwed up!'_ Tony thought as he stared out the window. ' _Aw well. You can't have everything, DiNozzo,'_ part of him thought. The other part finished, ' _But, you know, I would settle for something.'_ And it was true. Tony bragged. About women, about money, about friends, about his abilities, about nearly everything. But, was any of it true? Sure, he wasn't that bad to look at. And, sure, it wasn't that hard for him to pick up a chick. But, nothing was exceptional; it never was. It was always ordinary. Where's the extra-? No, no, Anthony DiNozzo Jr., despite his talk, was anything but extraordinary. He was...well, he didn't really know what he was. He knew he could be annoying and irritating, but was that really his fault? He was impulsive. He was never any good at holding things inside. But, then again, he never told anyone about his father. ' _Anyone. Anyone except Gibbs,'_ Tony thought. ' _But that was different. He ordered me to. And, maybe I wanted to? I don't know. It's too complicated! Why, DiNozzo? Why is it so complicated? Because it is! There's no simple answer this time. Then why don't you uncomplicate it? I don't know how, okay? Yeah, I just said that- well,_ thought _that. I'm not actually saying any of this outloud- I, Anthony DiNozzo, admit to not knowing how to do everything. Do you know how to do anything? Is it all a lie? No, no! It's not_ all _a lie! Just some of it. Did you lie to yourself? ...Maybe? Oh, great! Now I'm arguing with myself inside my head! Why is it so quiet in this car?! Literally no one has said anything the whole ride! How long have we even been driving? I don't even remember. Ten minutes? Thirty? An hour? Two?'_

Tony eyed the people around him as he thought, ' _Why aren't any of them looking at me? Are they mad I didn't tell them anything? Or maybe they're uncomfortable around me? Maybe- maybe it's awkward. Did I make it awkward? Wait- McGee and Kate don't even know about anything! Why are they acting weird? Unless- Did Gibbs tell them!? Oh my God! Why would he do that? Why would he- ?'_ Tony started to inwardly panic as he psyched himself out. He shook his head quickly and rethought that. ' _No. No, Gibbs wouldn't betray my trust like that. He knows me, I think. Knows I don't trust easily...or at least not as easily...not since what happened in Baltimore. Gibbs was there. Somehow he'd known...No, scratch that. He didn't know. He'd followed him. He'd followed his gut. He's got a good gut. Oh...my God! Why is everyone staring at me? What'd I miss? Did someone ask me a question? That's weird. How'd it go from ignoring me to not taking their eyes off me? Seriously, why are they gazing at me? Did I do something stupid again?'_

Gibbs looked at Tony for a second before he said, for the third time, "DiNozzo!"

Finally, Tony snapped out of it. "What?"

"We're here," Gibbs said slowly. "Get out of the car, Tony."

It was then that it clicked in Tony's brain that, for the second time in three days, everyone was outside the car except for him. And they were all standing in front of his opened door. "Oh," Tony uttered attempting to stand as he opted to get out of the car as smoothly as possible. He failed quickly as he fell back, not even reaching a standing position. Gibbs grimaced as it dawned on Tony that you have to unbuckle before getting out of the car. Which he did, as quickly as possible, getting out of the car.

Gibbs placed a hand on Tony's shoulder as the other two shuffled into the elevator. As it closed behind them, Gibbs said, "DiNozzo- ?"

"'m fine!" Tony busted out strongly, louder than he meant. He blushed and quickly apologized.

"No, you're not."

"I am, boss, I swear! I'm so sorry! And I know saying you're sorry is a sign of weakness, but that was a little outrageous! I know. It was- It was really loud, wasn't it? I mean, you know, sometimes you think you're speaking like a normal person, then _kapow!_ and you're screaming!" Tony silenced as Gibbs held a finger to his lips.

"I was talkin' about when you said you were fine," Gibbs cleared up.

"Oh. Right. I don't know why I did that. Uh, I am fine though, boss. Really," Tony explained.

"You're not fine," Gibbs summed up.

"I am though!" Tony all but whined a little, trying not to sound like a child, but also a little upset at Gibbs for not believing him.

Gibbs just narrowed his eyes at him for a moment.

"I'm sorry- again. But, I am fine, boss," Tony fixed himself, putting on his normal voice.

Gibbs nodded, but said, "You're not. Go see Ducky."

Tony couldn't help his confusion.

"I wanna know every single injury you have. And, I wanna hear it from Ducky 'cause I know you'll lie to me," Gibbs clarified.

"Boss, I wouldn't- !" Tony began.

"Yeah. Right. Go," was all Gibbs said before leading Tony to the elevator.

* * *

Tony, too tired to argue with Gibbs, made his way to autopsy quietly. As he walked in, he called, "Hey, Ducky! What's up, man? Oh, you're busy? That's cool. I'll come back later, man." He turned on his heel.

Then, Ducky said, "Not at all, my dear boy! Jethro told me you were coming! Come in, come in!"

Tony closed his eyes as he hadn't thought about that. Then, having no other choice, shuffled into the room. "Alright, Ducky. But I'm gonna let you know, you aren't going to find anything. I'm cool."

Ducky nodded with a patient smile. "Perhaps I should examine you first."

"Eh, we could do that too, I guess," Tony offered.

"Excellent! Anthony, hop up on that table, if you would," Ducky said, pointing to one near the door. Tony nodded as Ducky called, "Just call me if you need assistance!" as he disappeared in his office for a minute.

He disappeared just long enough for Tony to mumble, "Assistance? I don't need assistance! I'm a DiNozzo. DiNozzos don't need assistance!"

"Or perhaps," Ducky said, walking back in, "it's that they never ask."

"Maybe," Tony muttered, slightly embarrassed that Ducky had heard him.

Ducky placed the end of a stethoscope against his chest, attempting to hear the _thump-thump thump-thump_ of Tony's heartbeat, as he instructed him to "Take a deep breath for me?"

Ducky nodded, placing the stethoscope lower on Tony's abdomen, to auscultate for bowel sounds. He nodded again as he moved the stethoscope to Tony's back. "Okay, another deep breath?" As Tony complied, Ducky removed the stethoscope and said, "Good. Your breathing sounds okay, but, Anthony, I did notice that you seemed to wince a bit as you took deep breaths. Does it hurt when you breath?"

Tony shrugged, answering, "A little, I guess."

"Where?" Ducky asked.

"I don't know- In the breathing area," Tony answered.

"What about here?" Ducky asked applying pressure to Tony's right side, just under his chest.

"Ow!" Tony cried out painfully. "Yeah."

"It's tender?" Ducky's asked again, feeling for a break.

"Ow!" Tony nodded. "Is that bad?"

Ducky looked at the young man before him before he answered. "I don't know yet. I wanna take some abdominal x-rays."

"So, it's bad!" Tony worried.

"Now, don't fret, Anthony. We don't know yet. It could be serious or it could just be a superficial abrasion. Just try to relax. Nothing's certain yet."

"Yeah," Tony said. ' _But if I've learned anything in my life, it's that one thing...can change everything.'_


	7. Chapter 7: How Bad?

**Chapter Seven: How Bad?**

Gibbs strode into the elevator after a call from Ducky. He didn't say anything, just to get down there. But, if he was with DiNozzo, it couldn't be good. Anthony DiNozzo. It was never easy with Tony. Not that it was Tony's fault. It had to do with how you were raised. Tony was raised to never show weakness. He was taught that crying, being in pain, and feelings were a sign of weakness. They weren't. And Gibbs had a feeling that Senior didn't give a damn if Tony was weak. More like, he didn't wanna deal with a crying kid, an injured kid, an emotional kid. He didn't need that headache. Why he ever became a father, Gibbs had no idea. He didn't deserve Tony. Tony- his senior field agent. Tony was hardworking, courageous, trustworthy, strong. But there came a breaking point for everyone, didn't there? Tony should've been broken long ago, but somehow he kept moving forward. He didn't break, he survived.

The elevator doors opened to Tony sitting on a table and Ducky looking at x-rays. "Boss?" Tony said, looking at the opening doors.

"DiNozzo," Gibbs acknowledged him. "Duck?"

"Ah, Jethro!" Ducky glanced at Tony, then said, "Might I have a word with you in my office?"

Gibbs got the hint, saying, "Sure, Duck," and followed him into his office. Ducky shut the door after Gibbs. "What's up?"

"Anthony is stubborn," Ducky said.

Gibbs smiled, "Yeah, Duck. I think I know that."

Ducky smiled back, "Yes, but, because of this, Anthony won't admit to being injured. It's about pride. It's about fear. It's about trust. He fears trust."

"So, he wouldn't tell me how injured he was because he doesn't trust me?" Gibbs wondered.

"I don't think it's quite that. I think Anthony believes he does trust you, but, subconsciously, he doesn't want to show anyone, especially you, his weaknesses. He looks up to you. He doesn't want you to think less of him," Ducky explained.

"Aw, Duck. You know I'd never think less of him for getting hurt," Gibbs said. "Especially considering the way he did."

"Yes, I know that. But, I'm not so sure Anthony does. I think he still fears that you will be disappointed in him."

Gibbs closed his eyes in shame. He hadn't meant to make Tony feel that way. "So, what is wrong with him, physically?"

"Well, he has several bruises on his arms, consistent with the pressure of fingers pressing onto them. One larger bruise on the inside of his wrist looks to be where he was initially grabbed. And he has about three sets of bruises on each arm, five bruises in each set. A large bruise on his right upper arm shoulder looks like he collided with something, a wall perhaps. Moving to the abdomen, he has bruised ribs all along the right side as well as three fractured. Other than that, no facial wounds and no injuries past the waist. Seems as though the perpetrator was aiming for Anthony's torso area," Ducky had observed.

"Because that part can be covered up," Gibbs said under his breath. "You tell DiNozzo?"

"Not quite yet. I wanted to let you know first," Ducky said.

"Why?" Gibbs wondered.

"Because, because of his fractures, he will be sentenced to desk duty for six to eight weeks. And, I figured it'd probably be a two man job breaking that to him."

Gibbs smiled as he said, "He is gonna be pissed."

They walked out and saw Tony fidgeting where he sat, then wincing at the pain it caused. "You know," Gibbs started, causing Tony to jump and then cry out in pain, "if you would stop moving, you'd be in less pain."

"I'm not in pain, boss!" Tony said quickly.

"Yeah, ya are," Gibbs said matter-of-factly.

Tony rolled his eyes. "So, what's up?"

"Well, Anthony, do you want the short answer or the long answer?" Ducky asked.

"Short," Tony said quickly.

"You have several bruises, which will heal. I'm sure you've realized the whole right side of your abdomen is bruised?" Tony nodded slowly. "The only thing you have to be worried about is, on your right side, you have three fractured ribs. Everything else will heal in a week or two."

"And, what about the ribs?" Tony asked.

"Yes, well, fractured ribs will take around six to eight weeks to heal. Anthony, you won't be able to do field work," Ducky said kindly.

"What? Why not?" Tony asked, as he hated desk duty.

"You're injured, DiNozzo," Gibbs said.

"So? I'll just get some ice and wrap it with one of those bandage things," Tony told them.

"Yes, well, that can be dangerous, Anthony," Ducky advised. "It can increase the risk of lung collapse and lung failure. Besides that, it can constrict your airway."

"Is that all?" Tony asked facetiously. "So, what am I supposed to do? Writhe in pain?"

"Oh, of course not, Anthony. I'll get you an ice pack from the freezer and you'll ice the pained area; twenty on, ten off," Ducky explained. Tony nodded. Ducky took out a bottle of pills, saying, "And, of course, I can give you pain medication-"

"Oh, I am not taking painkillers! I'd rather be in pain!" Tony huffed.

Ducky looked to Gibbs. "Oh, he'll take 'em," Gibbs said, as Ducky passed him the bottle.

"I don't need them, Gibbs!" Tony said.

Gibbs frowned at how much Tony was acting like a child. "You will take them, whether you want to or not."

"But, they make me all...loopy," Tony tried to explain.

Gibbs smiled inwardly at the young man's explanation. Then, said, "I'd rather have you acting 'loopy' than for you to sit in pain. You're on desk duty anyway."

"About that-" Tony tried to argue.

Ducky jumped in, "Yes, Anthony. Desk duty. You need to avoid too much movement for the next six weeks or so. You'll also need plenty of sleep and bedrest."

Tony sat for a minute, thinking about what he'd learned. Then, finally, he sighed. "This sucks," he concluded, which nobody could disagree with.

* * *

Tony stood in the elevator, leaning on the back wall, behind Gibbs. Gibbs glanced behind him. Tony had his eyes closed and looked as though the wall was the only thing keeping him upright. As the elevator doors opened to the squad room, Tony didn't move. Gibbs turned and grabbed Tony's shirt, pulling him from the elevator, muttering, "Come on, DiNozzo."

Gibbs practically dragged Tony all the way to his desk and sat him in his chair. "What's going on, DiNozzo?" Gibbs asked, leaning on Tony's desk.

"Nothing. I'm fine," Tony told him.

"Yeah, I'll believe that when I don't have to cart your ass back to your desk. What's up?" Gibbs whispered, so only Tony could hear.

"Nothing. I'm cool, whatever," Tony said back. Gibbs stared at him until he was forced to answer. "I don't wanna be benched from field work. Look, I mean, think about it. I went to Chesapeake and I was fine. And I'm still fine."

"You weren't fine then. You were acting like you were fine. There's a difference, DiNozzo," Gibbs said, walking back to his desk. "You will not be doing _anything_ in the field until you are cleared for field work by Ducky."

Tony rolled his eyes as Gibbs turned and glared at him. "Fine," Tony answered. "But, just so you know, I am not in pain at all."

Gibbs rolled his eyes. Why did Tony make everything so difficult.

* * *

An hour later found all four of them reviewing different cold cases in silence. As Gibbs glanced up, he saw Tony, once again, fidgeting in his seat, which clearly caused him pain. "Tony," Gibbs said, causing Tony to look up, "sit still."

"I am...I'm trying," Tony muttered.

"Yeah, I know. Why don't we try some painkillers," Gibbs said, taking out the bottle, and walking to the young man's desk.

"No," Tony said instantly.

"You are going to take them or-"

"Or what? You can't make me do anything! And, I don't care what you say, I'm not taking them!"

Gibbs took his hand to the back of Tony's head. It no longer mattered if he was injured. Tony needed to drop the attitude he was carrying. "With me, DiNozzo," Gibbs said, leaving no room for an argument. As he strode to the elevator, he could hear Tony reluctantly stand up and follow him.

As the doors of the elevator closed, Gibbs pulled the emergency brake and glared at Tony.  
"What?!" Tony asked, rather rudely.

"You know damn well what! I'm sick of you and that attitude of yours. Drop it or go home," Gibbs threatened.

"You can't-"

"Oh, the hell I can't! And, if you don't take these painkillers in about five seconds, you'll be going home anyway! If you wanna sit in pain on your own time, whatever. But, I am not about to sit here and watch you writhe and squirm in pain because you're too stubborn and pigheaded to take any help! You're injured, and it's not your fault, but you are injured! You need to take someone's help. And if you won't accept anyone else's help, accept mine. Because it's me you should worry about. You know, when I realized you were injured, I wasn't even thinking about the job, I wasn't thinking about replacing you like you thought. I was worried about you. Not the case, not the job, you. You are more important than the job. Understand?" Gibbs ranted.

Tony was speechless. He finally nodded shakily as Gibbs passed him two pills and a bottle of water. Tony reluctantly took both pills as Gibbs watched him closely, making sure he swallowed them. Then, Gibbs pulled out the emergency brake, returning them to the squad room. As Tony walked back to his desk, Gibbs told the three he would be going on a dinner run and that they should all continue to work on the cold cases until he returned. They all nodded as he turned and left.

As soon as the elevator doors shut, Kate and McGee walked up to Tony's desk. Kate asked, "Okay, DiNozzo, spill. Why are you benched from the field?"

Tony smiled charmingly. "Three fractured ribs, which isn't that big of a deal, but Ducky says I need to rest to heal or something like that. So, now I'm benched from field work."

"How did you fracture three ribs?" McGee asked.

"None of your business, probie," Tony said, good-naturedly.

"Come on," Kate said. "Ducky knows, considering he treated you. And, if Ducky knows, Gibbs knows. And, if Gibbs knows, why can't we know?"

"Because," Tony answered, "you are neither my doctor or my boss."

Kate and McGee both rolled their eyes as McGee asked, "Why is it such a big secret?"

"It isn't. I just don't feel like telling you. McGee, you won't understand, and Kate, you are too judgmental," Tony said.

"Oh, come on, Tony!" Kate said.

"Fine," Tony agreed, "I'll tell you. But, I'm gonna tell you, it's not a pretty story."

"Fine, whatever, spill it," Kate said eagerly.

"Alright. So, about four-ish nights ago, I was at the video store, looking for a flick, when I ran into this girl, Jodie. She was all over me, so we went back to her place with the movie. _Cool Hand Luke_ , with Paul Newman. He refuses to-" As the two listeners rolled their eyes, Tony said, "Alright, moving on. Well, after the movie, we moved it to the bedroom, right? So, you know, we're...you know, doing stuff and I fell onto the floor. Three fractured ribs, and I kept going!"

"Oh my God, Tony!" Kate said, disgusted, as she and McGee moved back to their desks to get back to work on the cold cases.

Tony smiled and called, "What can I say? She liked it rough!"


	8. Chapter 8: Perfect

**Chapter Eight: Perfect**

Gibbs came back into the squad room baring Chinese food. As he set the food down, Kate ran over. "Thank God, Gibbs! I'm starved!" She was followed by McGee. Tony didn't look like he realized Gibbs had come back. His head was resting on his desk, arms used as a pillow. Gibbs winced at his crumpled figure which he figured would hurt like hell when he awoke. With only Tony's food remaining in the bag, he took it over and dropped it down on Tony's desk.

Tony's head shot up quickly, his body following. "What?! Stop! Don't!" Tony mumbled out, groggily. Then grimaced at the pain of moving too fast.

Gibbs shook his head and asked, "You okay?"

Tony smiled sheepishly at his previously panicked state. He didn't even remember why he was so jumpy. Nevertheless, he shook it off and replied, "Never better."

Gibbs pointed to the bag. "Food. Eat," Gibbs ordered as he walked back to his own desk.

Tony chuckled lightly, which turned into an "Ow, ow, ow! Got it, boss. Ow, ow!" before he regained control.

Gibbs nodded. "Simmer down, DiNozzo. It's gonna hurt for a bit."

"Yeah, I'm starting to get that," Tony sighed.

* * *

Forty five minutes later, they all had finished and were back to their cold cases. All was silent, until…

"Tony!" Abby ran in.

As Tony stood to embrace Abby, she swooped him into a hug. Tony winced and said, "Careful, Abs."

"Right. Sorry," Abby said, letting him go. "So? How are you?"

"Good," Tony said.

"Tony," Abby said, "you are not good. You are broken."

"Thanks," Tony said sarcastically.

"Well?" Abby asked.

"Well what?"

"How are you?"

Tony, noticing everyone was watching him and figuring he couldn't lie anymore, said, "I've been better."

"Well, that's obvious. Can you walk around? Can you talk? Can you breathe?"

"Of course, Abs. Just my ribs, remember?" Tony explained.

"Okay, okay. Just promise me you'll get better," Abby told him, worriedly. "I don't want a broken Tony forever! I want goofball Tony back!"

"I will, Abs. Honest. And, just so you know, Abby, goofball Tony is never gone forever," Tony said, smiling. She nodded and escaped back down to her lab, after one more quick hug.

Gibbs stood. "Go home. Get some sleep. I want you here at 0700 tomorrow."

McGee and Kate stood and headed for the elevator, gleefully. Tony continued to work as though Gibbs hadn't said anything.

"Your ears workin', DiNozzo? Told ya to go home," Gibbs threw across the room.

"I heard you. I'm just wondering why," Tony told him.

"What do you mean?" Gibbs asked.

"I mean," Tony said, throwing the case file down with a thud, "any other time, we'd be staying till ten at least!"  
"What's your point?"

"My point is that it's seven thirty. You're giving me special treatment!" Tony exclaimed irritably.

After a while, Gibbs frowned. "DiNozzo, in the three years you've known me, have I ever given anyone special treatment?"

Reluctantly, Tony admitted, "No, except for Abby."

Gibbs replied, "Do I give her special treatment or does she just do as I ask without questioning me at every turn? You don't trust me."

"I do trust you!" Tony said as though it was obvious.

"Do you?! Because I'm not so sure!"

"...Nevermind," Tony said, packing up his stuff. "You don't get it."

"Get what, DiNozzo?" Gibbs asked.

"Me!" Tony answered. "I'm not helpless. I can do things. You've been treating me different ever since you found out what my father did. I'm not a victim or else I would've fought back. I didn't try to stop him."  
"Tony, that's the damn near stupidest thing I've ever heard! You are a victim. It doesn't mean anything that you didn't try to fight back! You were scared!"

Tony indignantly said, "I wasn't scared. It's just something that happens."

"Are you gonna sit there and tell me that, when your father was beating the crap out of you, you weren't scared even a little bit?!" Gibbs said, harsher than he meant.

In an instant, Tony's expression changed from that of anger to disconsolate humiliation. He looked...alone. And, to Gibbs' dismay, Tony looked to be in a state of trepidation. He looked...afraid. "DiNozzo…"

Tony shook his head. "I'm never scared. I don't have reason to be. I'm used to it."

And that's what broke Gibbs' heart. Not that he accepted what his father did. Not even that he sometimes blamed himself for Senior's actions. But, the one sentence. The sentence that confirmed that it happened too often. Too often. So often that Tony had gotten used to it.

"And I do trust you...I think," Tony said as he walked to the elevator to head home.

It wasn't right. It wasn't right that Tony's father, someone he should be able to trust, would hurt him. It wasn't right that Tony's father got to do this without any consequences. But, mostly, it wasn't right that he got to flee to New York. That's what maddened him. Senior thought he could just abuse his only son, his child, and nothing would happen. He'd just flee to New York and continue to live his life. Tony knew too. He'd gotten used to that. Gibbs could've gone up to New York to avenge his senior field agent. He could've gone up there to defend Tony. After all, New York was only a drive from Virginia. But, that would be unethical. He couldn't drop everything, his job and his team, to go and teach Tony's father a little lesson about parenting. He couldn't do that. He knew right now that Tony would disprove. It was just anger he was feeling. But, oh man, did it burn him up to have to watch Tony in pain. In pain, hurt, injured for something that never should've happened...

"DiNozzo!" Gibbs called to Tony who was about to step into the elevator.

Tony looked up. "Yeah…?" he asked pensively.

"Hold up. I'll go down with you," Gibbs made a decision.

"Okay...if you want," Tony said, a little bemusedly.

Gibbs grabbed his stuff, packed it up for the night, and stepped into the elevator with Tony.

The elevator ride was short and silent. When the doors opened, Tony made to walk to his car when Gibbs said, "DiNozzo!" Gibbs started to walk to his own car as a confused Tony followed, if only to see what was up.

"What?" Tony wondered.

"Get some sleep. I don't want you looking exhausted tomorrow," Gibbs told him.

Tony nodded. "Yeah, I will, boss."

He nodded as Tony began walking back towards his own car. Gibbs got in his car and, after deciding Tony could take care of himself, he drove home.

At his home, Gibbs did what he always did in his free time. He worked on his boat.

* * *

About an hour or two later, he heard something walking down the steps. ' _Three guesses who,'_ he thought. "DiNozzo…?"

As the figure descended, he saw that he was correct. It was Tony, clad in pajama pants, a t-shirt, and tennis shoes. He smiled shyly.

"Thought I told you to get some sleep?" Gibbs reminded him.

"Yeah. I...tried," Tony told him.

"Yeah? And what happened?" Gibbs asked.

"I couldn't," Tony replied vaguely.

"DiNozzo, I know you didn't bring your ass over here to tell me you couldn't sleep for no reason. Why couldn't you sleep?" Gibbs said, tossing down the tool he was using.

He looked up at Tony. Tony appeared sheepish again, rocking on his feet at the bottom of the stairs, his fingers fidgeting. He looked as though he didn't know what to say. He shrugged. "I don't know."

Gibbs closed his eyes in frustration. "DiNozzo? What happened? You said you trusted me."

"I do!" Tony said automatically.

"Then tell me," Gibbs told him. "Tell me why you can't sleep."

"It's complicated," Tony answered.

"I think you think it's more complicated than it is. Come on," Gibbs said, passing Tony to walk up the stairs.

Tony followed as Gibbs sat on his couch. Tony looked confusedly at Gibbs. "Sit down, Tony."

Tony started to second guess himself as he looked at the door and uncomfortably told Gibbs, "Maybe, maybe I should-?"

"Park it, DiNozzo," Gibbs told him. "You came here to confide in me. Well, I'm listening, Tony."

"I'm just- I don't want- " Tony tried to tell him.

"I won't. I promise. Do ya trust me?" Gibbs asked him again.

This time, Tony just nodded.

"Okay, so…?"

Tony sighed deeply, before beginning, "I went home to my apartment after I, uh, after I left. I went in and I was really tired, so I tried to, uh, tried to sleep."

"And?"

"I couldn't. I, uh, I had a, um…" Tony faltered as he scratched his head in discomfort and embarrassment, and he looked down at the ground, unsure of how to continue. He was talking to Gibbs after all, a man he greatly respected. He didn't want to sound like, well, like he was weak or a child or both.

Gibbs nodded, knowing Tony was embarrassed to say what he'd had. "A nightmare?"

Tony nodded slowly. "Sort of. It was...worse...than a nightmare, I mean."

"Night terror," Gibbs corrected.

"A what?" Tony asked.

"Night terror. Worse than a nightmare. Can cause screaming and cold sweats. Stuff like that. Much more terrifying than a nightmare," Gibbs told him.

"Oh," Tony said quietly.

"That what you had?" Gibbs asked.

"I guess," Tony told him.

"What happened?"

"I don't remember. I had, two or three days ago, I had remembered what had happened during the, uh, ordeal. But, like, lately, like, since yesterday, I can never remember what it was. I just wake up in fear. And I don't know why. I don't remember what happens during the night terror," Tony admitted.

Suddenly, it struck Gibbs why Tony had come. He was scared. He was scared to be in his own apartment. Did this happen every time his father showed up unannounced? Tony. He'd injured Tony, bruised Tony, nearly broke Tony. But, the fear was understandably the worst thing Senior had done. Caused Tony to be scared, afraid he would come back. Scared Senior would find him. Senior had known what he'd done. That's why he'd fled. It made Gibbs so mad and sad everytime he looked at Tony, since he'd found out what Tony's father had done.

He glanced over at Tony. A smile played on his lips as he saw the young man had succumbed to sleep, just like that. Like they weren't in the middle of a conversation. Gibbs figured he was most likely reasonably exhausted. Who knew when Tony had last slept? Well, slept well. He stood up silently, moving Tony into a laying down position on the couch and removing his tennis shoes. He lifted up Tony's sleeping head to place a pillow under it. Then, retrieving a blanket from where it had fallen off the back of the couch, Gibbs draped it over the young man's sleeping figure. Gibbs shook his head. He didn't know how long Tony would sleep or what quality he would get, but the man before him needed every minute.

Gibbs looked at Tony. Not one agent before that young man had ever broken through Gibbs' walls. Not one. Before it was only professional work. Not one, before Tony, had ever come to him with any personal issues. Tony was different. Somehow, Tony had gotten Gibbs to put down his guard and care about the agents working for him. Tony hadn't cared when Gibbs reprimanded him even when he first started working at NCIS. He was always...listening, learning how to be a better agent. He seemed to know that, sometimes, he got off track and, sometimes, he needed a reminder to get his head back in the game. Tony didn't care what kind of attention he got, he was just happy to have any at all, Gibbs realized.

He never was just another agent. He had something about him, something that made him unique. And that was humor. He eased the tension. Many people wouldn't understand why Gibbs trusted him with his life, just by looking at Tony. He was a good agent, a good actor, a good kid with more scars and hidden pain than most could imagine. But he always got up. He always kept trying. He came off as lazy, even fooling his co-workers. But, anybody who really knew Anthony DiNozzo Jr. knew that under the devil may care facade, was a hardworking, passionate, loyal to a fault, compassionate, intelligent, and understanding young man that Tony hid. After all, he'd learned that if you showed your true self, you were weak and people would see you as such. If you play the bully, you'll never be the victim. And Tony didn't want to be the victim any longer. He wanted to be himself, but not if people would think he was weak. One person in his life already thought he was weak. And, if you're weak, you don't survive. Tony knew he had. He'd survived, if just by luck. He survived. But what Tony didn't realize was that his father was lying. You're not weak if you cry. You're not weak if you're in pain. You're not weak if you feel emotion. You're human.

Tony looked peaceful for the moment, so Gibbs crept down the stairs to work on his boat. Until he heard someone screaming.


	9. Chapter 9: Trust

**Chapter Nine: Trust**

And he heard it. The terrified scream from upstairs. He dropped his tool on the table and took the stairs two at a time. And there was his agent. Thrashing in his sleep, no longer screaming, but mumbling. Gibbs sat on the floor in front of the couch. Tony, who was facing the back of the couch, was trembling. Gibbs gently placed a hand on the man's back and quietly said, "Tony, you're okay. Relax."

Tony didn't wake up, but slowly relaxed under Gibbs' hand. The mumbling slowed and he stopped shaking. His breathing slowed as well.

Gibbs looked at his agent sadly, fearing that if he moved away, Tony would become frightened again. So, he didn't move. He stayed right where he was, moving his hand in small circles on Tony's back in an effort to keep the young man in a calm state. After about two hours, Gibbs realized he needed sleep too, and moved over to the recliner, careful not to disturb Tony. And he quickly fell asleep himself.

* * *

Three hours later had Gibbs awake and looking at his watch. 0500. Tony was still sleeping on his couch. He walked to the kitchen for coffee.

* * *

0615\. Tony awoke, sitting up on the couch. He gasped as the pain of sitting up coursed through him. He felt disoriented. Where was he? And it hit him. He'd fallen asleep at Gibbs' house. He hadn't been invited, but he needed to go somewhere, anywhere that wasn't his apartment. But then, he couldn't remain awake any longer and had fallen asleep on his boss' couch. He suddenly flushed with embarrassment at what had happened.

But, Gibbs hadn't woken him up and told him to get out. He let him stay there, on his couch, for the whole of the night. Somehow that made him feel worse. That meant that he had looked so pitiful, Gibbs had allowed him to stay. His boss was pitying him which was not Tony's intent. Tony didn't want to be pitied in fact.

As Tony continued to sit, feeling awful, Gibbs called, "Problems, DiNozzo?" Tony turned so quickly, it caused him to cry out in pain. "Care-ful," Gibbs warned, holding his fourth cup of coffee.

"Boss. I am- I'm so sorry," Tony said quickly.

Gibbs frowned as he asked, "What're you sorry for?"

"What am I…? For invading your house!" Tony said, confused as to why Gibbs wasn't more upset.

Gibbs had to try not to laugh. He walked in and stood in front of Tony. "It's not a fortress, DiNozzo. It's a house, and my door's always unlocked. And you're always welcome."

Tony furrowed his brow as he asked, "Why?"  
"Why what?"

"You said I was always welcome. Why? Is it pity?" Tony asked honestly.

Gibbs looked up at the ceiling, exasperated at his SFA. Tony was smarter than this. "No, DiNozzo. In fact, it's not pity at all! It's the fact that I'd rather have you be able to come to my house when you feel anxious in your apartment rather than to have you wandering the streets because you think I'll be upset! Well, I'll tell ya, DiNozzo! You coming to my house because you're frightened doesn't upset me. Now, you thinking that I would be upset, that kinda does upset me. You need to know that I'm never gonna forget about you, Tony. I'm not gonna replace you or let you run away because you're scared. I'm not gonna just let you fend for yourself or find your own way out because I'm busy. I know! You need guidance. You need someone to count on. You- You're not just an agent, Tony. Okay? You are a person, and I see you as such. Yeah, you're a great agent. Knew that the first time I met you. But, you are more than that. You matter."

"To who?! I'm just- People don't expect things from me. I'm never anyone's first pick. Hell, I wouldn't even pick me! I can't do anything special. I'm not...special. I'm average. People only need me till they find someone better. I'm a substitute and I'm temporary, but nothing's permanent. You- You're my boss, Gibbs, and I do respect you. But, you shouldn't have to deal with my baggage. You hired me for your team, not to listen to my problems," Tony replied.

"I did hire you to be an agent. But, that doesn't mean you can't come to me. And, you know what? You're a great asset to the team, DiNozzo. You talk, DiNozzo, a lot. You may not think that's anything, but several times, your thinking out loud is the reason the case was solved. And you matter...to me. DiNozzo, you _are_ special. Three years I've known you, I have never been so involved in an agent's life. I have never cared, but you? I did for you. I cared about you because you were broken. You were valuable, but broken. You needed someone, anyone to care because you were falling apart. And you needed to be helped, saved because you were and are good. You are still the only one that doesn't know this! It's obvious! But you were broken, and you put on a good facade. A happy, carefree facade that was almost believable. I'll give you that. But you didn't forget. Everyone in your life that you had trusted had lied to you, had pretended, had played the part. And, I bet that's why you can't seem to fully trust me. Because every single person you trusted stabbed you in the back, betrayed you! Or...left you behind. Well, Tony? I'm not gonna do that. Whether you believe me or not, that's up to you. But, I've never been one to lie to those I care about. It's 0630. You might wanna go home, get ready. I'm not making exceptions for you, DiNozzo, even if you do have a few busted ribs. Because I know that a few broken ribs are nothing to you, considering your medical history. 0700. Not a minute later," Gibbs told him as he walked up his stairs. As Tony began to head for the front door, thinking he'd never heard Gibbs say that many words at one time, Gibbs threw over his shoulder, "And you're my six, DiNozzo. 'Course I'd pick you."

Tony smiled a soft smile as he shut the front door. Did Gibbs really care? He wasn't sure. But he knew that he did want to trust Gibbs, but he'd forgotten how to trust. When you trust, you get hurt. Tony didn't want to hurt anymore.

* * *

0700\. Everyone was seated at their desks, working. Everyone except Gibbs, who was on a coffee run. Tony was told to stay in his seat. He was tapping his pen on his desk, bored out of his mind. Less sweltered than earlier in the week because, ever since he had been discovered, he could wear short sleeves as it no longer mattered if people could see his bruised arms. But, bored. They didn't have a case, only cold cases, all day. And, even if they had had a case, Tony would be forbidden from going to the crime scene. So, there he sat, tapping his pen, bored out of his mind.

"Tony," Kate called from her desk across from him. "You think you could stop it with the pen for five seconds? I can't concentrate."

Tony sighed, not in the mood for a whole thing. "Whatever," he said, standing up.

"I thought you were supposed to stay at your desk, Tony?" McGee asked from his own desk.

"Probie," Tony said, soundly slightly exasperated, "Gibbs isn't here. I'm going to the head. Would you like to accompany me?"

McGee shook his head. "I'm good."

"Alright then," Tony said, heading to the nearest restroom.

If truth be told, he didn't actually need to use the restroom. He just needed to move around. He was getting restless. He was bored and he didn't want to just sit behind a desk all day, everyday for two and a half months. It was, in short, a living hell.

Suddenly, the door busted open, revealing a not-so-happy Gibbs, saying, "I thought I told you to stay at your desk?"

Tony, still with his hand over his heart, said, "Boss! You nearly gave me a heartattack! Why didn't you just come in like a normal person?"

"Why didn't you stay at your desk?"

"I was going to the head," Tony told him.

"Really. Because you have gone to the head eight times in this past hour. So, what's the real reason?" Gibbs said.

"Well, how'd you even...? I mean, you weren't even...! I didn't...? Kate. Fine. I have gone to the head eight times in an hour. But, only because I am bored out of my mind! I wanna be in the field."

"No one's in the field right now," Gibbs reminded him.

"Yeah, but even when we get a case, I'm gonna be stuck here! It sucks. I didn't _ask_ for my ribs to break! It's not fair."

"No. It's not. But, it's for your own good. I let you in the field, it's doing nothing to help you heal. You might be down longer than two months if you don't take some time to rest. I want you a hundred percent, and I won't have that if you don't take time to heal." Gibbs nodded towards the bathroom door. "Go."

Tony scowled at Gibbs, but nevertheless walked out of the bathroom and back to the squad room. He plopped himself down in his chair with a huff, crossing his arms. "What's your problem?" Kate asked.

"Why'd you snitch on me?" Tony asked her.

"When?"

As Gibbs walked in, his phone rang. He answered it with, "Gibbs."

Tony whispered loudly to Kate, "When you told," Tony mouthed 'Gibbs', "that I'd gone to the head eight times in the hour!"

"What? He asked me where you were. I told him you were in the bathroom. Then, he asked how many times you'd gone to the bathroom in the past hour. So, I told him. I didn't know it was a secret. Did you want me to lie for you?"

"No. You were supposed to cover for me, like a partner does?" Tony told her.

Kate rolled her eyes as Gibbs said the words Tony was partially dreading. "Gear up. Got a dead marine in Quantico."

As everyone was gearing up, Tony thought maybe he could just, like, grab his gear and come along. And, by the time anyone remembered he wasn't supposed to be there, it would be too late. You just have to act the part. Act like your ribs don't hurt like hell. Before Tony could move more than a quarter inch towards his bag, Gibbs said, "Don't even think about it, DiNozzo. Desk duty means no field work."

Tony sighed. Why couldn't Gibbs just let it slide. He thought about it. Something didn't quite add up. "Boss, come on! If it was you who had three broken ribs, you would _never_ be confined to your desk!"

Gibbs shook his head as he holstered his gun. "Nope. Probably not. But you will," he told Tony as he followed Kate and McGee to the elevator.

After they were gone, Tony muttered to himself, "Of course. Do as I say, not as I do. Typical."

"I think it's a sign you're going crazy if you start to talk to yourself, Tony."

"Abby! Pleasure seeing you up here. What are you doing up here?" Tony asked.

"I figured you were bored. Thought you could do with some entertainment," Abby told him.

"Entertainment? What kind of entertainment?"

"How does _Forrest Gump_ sound?" Abby asked.

"It's a good movie. I like _Forrest Gump_. Let's watch it before I, you know, go crazy," Tony told her.

"That's probably a good idea," Abby told him, playing the movie on the plasma screen. She sat on Gibbs' desk.

As the movie went on, Tony's eyes started to feel droopy. His head started to feel very heavy. He didn't even feel it when his head hit his desk with a thump. However, Abby heard it.

"Ooh. Sorry, Forrest, Lieutenant Dan. We'll have to finish this movie some other time, presumably when Tony's well rested," Abby said, bouncing up quietly and stopping the movie. She walked toward the elevator, after giving Tony a soft hug. Tony needed peace and he needed quiet, which Abby didn't mind giving him. She was gonna have a lot of work to do when the rest of the team returned anyway. So, taking the elevator, she escaped to her lab to ready for the oncoming case.


	10. Chapter 10: Complications

**Chapter Ten: Complications**

"McGee! Go. Help Abby," Gibbs ordered.

"Uh, yes, boss," McGee answered.

"Kate. I want everything since Collins was born."

"Got it, Gibbs," Kate said, already picking up her phone.

Gibbs looked at the sleeping form of his six. He hadn't had the heart to wake him up earlier. But, now, he needed him to help with the case.

"Tony," he said, jogging over to Tony's desk. "Hey, Tony."

Tony sat up groggily, pain clear on his face.

"When were your last painkillers?" Gibbs asked quietly.

"Uh...um...last...uh...yesterday, when you forced me to," Tony remembered.

"DiNozzo," Gibbs warned, "I shouldn't have to force you. Take some more."

Tony gave him a look, then said, "Seriously?"

"Yeah, Tony. Seriously. Come on! Get moving!" Gibbs told him. Gibbs didn't move until he saw Tony swallow the two pills. Then, he told him, "Help Kate."

"Yeah, okay," Tony told him. "Kate, what do you need help with?"  
"Yeah, thanks," Kate said, finishing up her phone call. She turned to look at Tony. "You look awful." At the look he gave her, she told him, "Background."

He nodded and set to work, just as Gibbs told them he was going up to MTAC to see the director.

"Background...back...ground...back...ground...background," Tony muttered while he worked.

"Hey! You wanna quit that, DiNozzo?" Kate told him.

Tony rolled his eyes. "You know what it is? You just annoy too easily."

Just then, Tony's phone rang. "DiNozzo." Then, Tony paled. "N-no. Please? I don't- " And the line went dead.

Kate looked up. "Who was that?"

Tony shook his head. He got up and tried to casually walk to the restroom, but, in reality, he probably looked a hot mess.

He got to the restroom and looked in the mirror. He was pale and clammy. He was shaking. ' _Why? Why? Why?'_ he thought. ' _I can't do this.'_ But, he did his best to make himself look normal. He did his best, then walked out. He walked back to his desk.

"Where ya been, DiNozzo?" Gibbs said, walking in.

"The...The head," Tony told him shakily.

Gibbs immediately stopped at Tony's desk. "What?" he asked quietly.

"I...I can't…?" Tony mumbled out as Gibbs remembered Kate was still in the squad room.

"DiNozzo? With me," Gibbs said, leading him to the elevator.

As the doors closed and Gibbs pulled the emergency stop lever, Tony quietly asked, "What?"

"What do you mean what? You look like someone just died. What is it?"

"My...my dad's coming…?...back…? I'm…"

"Yeah," Gibbs told him soundlessly, more than a bit shocked. "When?"

"I don't know. He's getting on the plane now. Boss? It only takes an hour to get to DC from New York?! I don't know what to do," Tony admitted looking around at the elevator.

"Alright, alright. Calm down. You're here all day, and it's safe here. We got hundreds of federal agents here, armed guards. Tonight, you come to my house," Gibbs told him.

Tony tilted his head to the side. "Do you mean that?" Tony asked, surprisingly childlike.

"I wouldn't have said it if I didn't mean it," Gibbs told him. "And I have a big feeling he'll be waiting at your apartment."

"What if…? What if he finds me?"

"Oh, he won't."

Tony looked confused, but just nodded.

"You okay?" Gibbs asked him.

"I...I'm not sure," Tony told him.

Gibbs nodded, thankful Tony now seemed to trust him enough to be truthful. "Come on."

They went back up to the squad room. Tony sat behind his desk. They worked as though nothing had happened.

And when the day was done, Tony got in his car and drove to Gibbs' house. Gibbs got in his car, however, and drove to Tony's apartment. Whether Tony's dad was there or not, he was gonna find out. He couldn't tell Tony though. Tony would object. Not that Gibbs blamed him. Senior was his father. Maybe Tony would never hate senior, maybe he would always carry a love for his father. Maybe he didn't blame senior. But Gibbs sure as hell did. You never lay a harmful hand on your child. Every parent should know that! And he wasn't afraid of Tony's father. Senior was a coward. Gibbs' plan was to take care of him once and for all. He wouldn't touch him. Wouldn't let the bastard get lawyers involved. But he would talk to him, tell him to stay the hell away from Tony. And, if that didn't work, maybe he could kick Senior's ass a little.


	11. Chapter 11: Father Dearest

**Chapter Eleven: Father Dearest**

Tony arrived at Gibbs' house after work. He let himself in and sat on the couch. He knew Gibbs hadn't arrived yet due to the absence of his car. He wondered what was taking him so long. Had he run into traffic? He sat and waited the man to arrive.

* * *

Gibbs walked up to Tony's apartment and didn't bother knocking. He knew the door would be unlocked due to Senior's arrival. He walked in and shut the door quietly behind himself.

A voice came from the kitchen, "Junior? I thought...You're not Junior."

"Nope. Jethro Gibbs. I'd say it was a pleasure, but, under the circumstances, it's not really, is it?"

"Well, I'm assuming you know who I am. Who exactly are you?"

"I am your son's boss," Gibbs informed him.

"Oh, yeah. I might remember Junior saying something about you."

"Oh, when? When you were kicking his ass?" Gibbs decided to get to the point.

Then, Senior put on a big smile, which pissed Gibbs off further. "I don't think you're in any place to tell me how to parent."

Gibbs smiled back and nodded. "Nope." He dropped the smile. "But I'll be damned if I'm gonna let my Senior Field Agent be benched whenever you visit. He's too important for that. And I'm not gonna sit by while your parenting turns into abuse."

"I've been raising Junior for thirty three years. I think I know a little more than you," Senior said viciously.

"You know him? I bet you do. I bet you know how scared he is of you. I bet you know that you can do whatever you want to that kid, and he won't do anything. Because he's scared? No. Not that he isn't scared, but if he was only scared, he'd kick your ass. He doesn't because you're his father, or at least he still thinks you are."

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?!" Senior roared.

"That you haven't been his father for the past twenty five years. Your wife died, and Tony lost his father," Gibbs told him.

"How dare you! My wife- "

"-Cared for Tony. I know. He loved her almost as much as she loved him. And I think you should be ashamed of how you have treated him."

"He's fine," Senior told him.

"He's broken! You broke him! Do you understand? Your boy, your child can't trust anyone! Because of you! You broke his trust! You broke him, emotionally...and physically. You know, he was scared to death that you were gonna come back. I heard you told him you would come back if he told anyone what you'd done. So, I guess you do know it's abuse. Is that why you came back? You had a feeling he broke his promise that he shouldn't've had to make in the first place?"

"You got some nerve! I love my son!"  
"Well, you got a funny way of showing it. I think he still loves you for whatever reason, but I know you don't love him. No one treats someone they love like that. I mean, you broke him, stretched him beyond his limitations, and you don't care. You couldn't care less! And that's why I'm pissed. If Tony doesn't understand that he's too good a kid to have a father like you, I'm more than happy to drill it into his thick head."

"He's only a good kid because of me. I raised him! I made him who he is today!"

"Oh, I don't doubt that you influenced who he is today. I mean, because of you, he has trust issues, low self-esteem. He doesn't believe that anyone could care about him. And that's because of you," Gibbs explained.

"You don't know anything about my family!"

"I know more about him than you. I don't use him as a punching bag. That's you. I know about him. I know his strengths, and I know his weaknesses. I know his fears. I know what he needs, and I know how he thinks. You- You don't know any of that. The only thing you know is that when you hit him, he doesn't hit back."

Senior's face turned a new kind of red. "Get out."

"You can't tell me to leave. You don't live here. And you don't scare me. Sorry. You're gonna leave, back to New York or wherever you came from. You won't come back anymore. You will stop traumatizing that man, so he can heal. Understand?"

"No. Junior doesn't want me to leave. He already lost his mother," Senior told him.

"He's already lost his father!"

"I am the only parent he's got left."  
"I think he's better off with no parents than with you alone. You only want to stay to hurt him. Don't you understand that? Every time you see him, he gets hurt! And that's what got you on my bad side! I care too much for him, for his future, to have all that disappear because of you! He deserves to live without constant fear. He is more afraid of you than the criminals he deals with every day! Does that not bother you?"

"I wanna see Junior."

"Naw, that's never gonna happen. He's safer where he is," Gibbs told him.

Now Senior was fuming. "Tell me where my son is, Gibbs! Now!"

"No," Gibbs uttered the word.

That's when Senior made his move. He tried to go at Gibbs to tackle him, but it didn't take long for Gibbs to pin him to the ground. "I told you," Gibbs said as he held him down, "that you don't scare me."

"What," Senior said, failing to escape Gibbs, "What do you want?"

"The way I see it, you have two choices. Either go back to wherever you came from, or I call for backup and have you arrested right now. You choose."

"How do know I won't come back later?"

"Because we both now know that I can best you. And, if you do come back, you be sure to know, I won't go easy on you."  
"Why do you care so much about him? He's your _employee_ ," Senior spat.

Without even thinking, Gibbs immediately answered, "Because he matters. All he, and, then again, most people, see is that he's street smart, and sarcastic, and that he's rarely serious about anything. He's the funny guy, class clown."

"So?"

"So. I happen to know that he's more than just street smart, way more. He's...a very intelligent young man. And I also happen to know that he's serious about things he cares about. And I, like anyone who knows anything about Tony, know that he's a flirt and he loves movies, TV in general. And I also know that I have never met _anyone_ as loyal as him. He's devoted, faithful to me. Probably the most loyal young agent I've ever worked with. And I can put trust in him because of that. He's my six, and I wouldn't trade him for anything or anyone. Like I said, he's too important to lose. He's good. He doesn't know it, but he's good. And, believe you me, I'm not losing him to the likes of you."

* * *

"Where is he?" Tony said aloud in frustration. It had been three hours since he himself had arrived. Gibbs had yet to arrive. Tony had taken to pacing around the room. "Come on," he said, glancing at his watch.

Suddenly the door burst open as Gibbs made his way inside. Tony didn't waste a second to ask, "Where were you? It took you three hours to get here?"

"No. I had something to do. Why?" Gibbs responded.

"Why? Why? Because I've been waiting for you for the past three hours! Where'd you go?"

"Not important," Gibbs dismissed his question. "I'm hungry. You hungry? I'm gonna go see what I got in the kitchen."  
Tony's eyes widened in disbelief as Gibbs entered the kitchen. "It _is_ important," Tony said, turning and following Gibbs into the kitchen.

"Why?" Gibbs said, looking in his fridge.

Tony's mouth dropped as he couldn't believe his boss at the moment. "Because! I've been waiting for you for three hours!"

"Yeah, you mentioned that," Gibbs said. "What's your problem? I'm here now, aren't I?"

"The problem is that you said you were gonna be here. You should've told me if you were gonna be late. I'm only here because you asked me to come."

That got Gibbs' attention. He shut the fridge and looked the younger man in the eyes. "You are here to keep you safe."

"So, where were you?"

"It doesn't matter!"

"Why?"

"Because I'm not the one who was threatened! You were."

Tony opened his mouth to speak, then closed it. He ran his tongue over his lips as he said quietly, "Matters to me. I trust you, Gibbs, I do. But, look, I can't trust you if you aren't honest with me. You want me to tell you my life story, when you won't even tell me where you went. It's a two way street, Gibbs."

Gibbs thought about that for a minute. Then, looked at Tony. "That was corny."

Tony nodded his head to the side, "I learn from you."

Gibbs crooked a finger, quietly saying, "C'mon," and leading Tony back to the couch. After they sat down, Gibbs said, "I'm gonna tell you something. You're not gonna like it, but I should probably tell you anyway. I was at your apartment."

Tony's face turned from intent listening to confusion. "Why?"

"You're not stupid, DiNozzo. I think you know."

Tony smiled wryly. "My father?" At Gibbs' nod, Tony asked, "Did you kill him?"

"Not yet," Gibbs said. When Tony's eyes widened, he said, "Kidding."

"What _did_ you do?" Tony asked.

"Talked to him a little, then pinned him to the ground," Gibbs said nonchalantly.

Tony's eyes widened to the size of saucers. "What?! What, d'you wrestle him to the ground?!"

"Technically." Before Tony could say anything, Gibbs quipped, "But, he instigated it."

"What?" Tony asked in exasperation. "Did he try to kidney punch you?" he said, voice thick with sarcasm.

"That's boxing."

"I know it's boxing! Why did you wrestle him to the ground?!"

"Because," Gibbs said calmly, "he ran at me."

"Is that all?" Tony asked.

"Uh huh. Not that I didn't wanna do more, but it didn't seem very prudent."

Tony smiled a shy smile. "Yeah. Yeah, he has that effect on people. Where is he now?"  
"Said he was getting on a plane, goin' back to New York."

"Is he?"

"I hope so because, if not, I may have to kill him."

"Gibbs!"

"Kidding. But I did _warn_ him as to what may happen if he goes near you again. And, DiNozzo, I think you ought to get a restraining order against him."

Tony tilted his head from side to side until he agreed, "Yeah, okay. I gotta break Rule #6. I'm sorry I put you through this."

Gibbs shrugged. "Eh, you're worth it."

Tony smiled. "Thanks."

And the two sat in comfortable silence until Tony stood and said, "I, uh, I guess it's okay for me to go home now?"

"Tony, I told before and I meant it. You're always welcome."

"I know," Tony told him. After a minute, he asked shyly, "Is that forever?"

"As long as you need me, I'm here."


	12. Chapter 12: Regaining Normalcy

**Chapter Twelve: Regaining Normalcy**

 _3 Weeks Later_

Tony sat at his desk, smiling big. After a long three weeks, he was finally cleared for field duty.

Kate looked over at Tony. "You know, Tony, some people might think it creepy if someone smiled like that for no reason. But, for you, it seems normal. Why is that, DiNozzo?"

"Don't know, Kate. Maybe because I'm a happy person, generally. I's just so sick of desk duty! I'm finally back. You and McGee can sleep better now?"

"What do you mean?" McGee asked.

"Well, you and Kate can rest easily now that I'm back to save your…" as Gibbs walked in, Tony finished, "Asses! We were talking about asses, boss!"

"Good to know, DiNozzo," Gibbs said, shaking his head.

"Uh, well, that came out weird, boss. I was talking about Kate and McGee's...There's no way to fix it. I was saying that I'm back to watch their asses. You know, that's…!"

"DiNozzo? Quit while you're behind," Gibbs said, afraid of where his agent was leading.

"Yeah, got it, boss."

Gibbs' phone started to ring then, which he answered, "Yeah, Gibbs." He hung up and turned to his team. "Gear up! Got a dead body in Quantico!"

As Kate and McGee headed towards the elevator, Gibbs stopped by Tony's desk. "Take it easy today, DiNozzo. Don't wanna be back out on your first day back."

"Yeah, you got it, boss. And, uh, thanks for...everything. I know I'm not the easiest person to work with, so, uh, thanks," Tony said as they walked toward the elevator.

Gibbs motioned for Kate and McGee to head down, that he and Tony would meet them at the car. "DiNozzo. Do you remember what I told you after you apologized for bringing me into everything with your father?"

Tony slowly began to nod. "You...said I was worth it."

"And you are, so stop thanking me. You don't have to thank me for doing something that someone should've done a long, long time ago."

"Yeah, well, no one noticed because no one cared."

"You believe that?"

"Boss, when I was nine, they started calling me the unwanted kid because my dad never showed up for anything. I believe it," Tony admitted.

"I think nobody noticed because you didn't let them. You're a hell of an actor, DiNozzo. I've known you three years and I only found out because you were exhausted. Why do you do that?"  
"Because they wouldn't understand."

"That go for me too?"  
"That was kind of different. I mean, when I first joined your team, I wasn't gonna go and tell you my life story. It was already kinda weird already, given everything that had gone down with Danny. I wasn't gonna add to that. Then, later, it would've just been awkward. 'Hey! Did I ever tell you that my dad abused me?' Time went by and...too much time."

"What about when your dad came back? That seems like it would've been an opening?"

"Yeah, but I couldn't tell you. I was afraid of what you might think. I'm not...now. You know, my dad probably thinks he won. Because I gave up, let him win. I never took care of it myself. Never said anything, really, to him. He probably thinks I sent you in to take care of him."

Gibbs looked carefully at Tony before he said quietly, but sincerely, "Tony, giving up doesn't always mean that you are weak. Sometimes it means that you are strong enough to let go. You know, I used to think ending up all alone was the worst thing that could happen. It's not. The worst thing that can happen is ending up with people who make you feel all alone. I'm sorry that that's how you had to grow up. And I know that sometimes when you say you're okay, you're not...at all." Gibbs smiled a little as he finished, "You're a pathological liar, DiNozzo."

For the first time in a very long time, Tony was actually speechless. He didn't know what he should say to all that Gibbs had told him.

Gibbs had the answer. "Come on, presumably before the car leaves without us."

Tony smiled. "Boss, you know the car would never leave without you."

"Yeah, well, can't leave without you either. You're my six," Gibbs said. He strode into the elevator. Tony couldn't move. He just stood there smiling. He was worth it to someone...not the most obvious person you'd expect. But someone, and that's what mattered.

"DiNozzo! Are ya coming?"

Tony chuckled to himself as he called back, "Definitely!"


End file.
